- Your language
- How you voice your concerns
o Prioritizing fearful thinking to outweigh the positive thinking
o Letting your fears outweigh a positive choice given the individual circumstance suggests its safe to go with the positive choice
o If you made a list of pros and cons you’d be guided by the cons list instinctively
- How you frame your story
o Telling yourself and others all the bad things that shape your life
- This serves to traumatize or re-traumatize yourself
- This preserves and insures that you’ll never forget the bad even though it also insures that you’ll have trouble remembering the good
- Creates an energetic outcome that draws more of the same to happen again
- Remember: do what you always did and you’ll get what you always got applies here
- Playing the “what-if” game with yourself
- Guilt tripping yourself by saying “I should” do this and “I should” do that
- Words to encourage you to do over or be more perfect or encourage others to work harder to please you or meet your standards
o Oprah replied, when confronted by a rebellious employee who said Oprah was a perfectionist: “I’m not a perfectionist, I just strive for excellence.” There is a difference. Excellence is when you know what the best is that you can do, or have the time and/or energy to do. Perfection is striving for something more, which no one can ever achieve because it is subjective, the standard is set by the individual, and is always a moving target changed by the changing trends in society and your individual personal growth
- “Black an White Thinking” otherwise known as “global thinking”
o Meaning all or nothing thinking or
o It’s all good or all bad
- Stress
- Triggers for stress come from your job, your family, other relationships, your home and other responsibilities, your commute, your finances, the weather, moving, getting married, getting divorced, having a baby, getting ill, having an accident, and other unforeseen events
- How you manage your stress is unique to you. Some things you minimize and other things you may blow out of proportion. It depends on your belief system and your past
- Trauma
- Traumas can be acute (short lived) or chronic (repeated over a long time), small or large
- Panic attacks can be eliminated with EMDR
- Generalized anxiety, when the traumatic wound is identified, can be healed and any remnants can be managed with you managing the other triggers listed here
- Caffeine
- Switch to decaf tea or decaf coffee in the morning, or a cup of warm water
- Go to bed when you feel the first yawn of the evening, you are tired, listen to your body speak
- Stimulate your brain more during the day, exercise it like you exercise your body to fatigue it
- Drink Sleepy Time Extra (it has valerian in it) and/or take a tab of Valerian (it’s all natural valium)